I found myself staring at my six kids as they milled around the breakfast table yesterday. It brought a smile to my face. So I said, “I love you guys.” They each turned their heads and smiled. It was a nice moment. Then my 8-year-old son said, “Where are you going?”

Where am I going?

That seemed like an odd question to me. So I asked, “Do I have to be going somewhere to tell you I love you?” He said no, but my mind was now in overdrive.

I’m an overly affectionate guy, I think. I’m free with hugs, not just with my kids, but with everyone. I’m not afraid to wear my heart on my sleeve. And I want the people around me to know how much I appreciate them. Before yesterday morning, I would have told you that I randomly tell my children I love them more than the next guy. Clearly I was wrong.

I realize now that the most common time for me to tell my kids I love them is when I’m about to walk into my office, or go to a meeting, or leave on a business trip. It’s hit and run affection. It’s become a parting phrase. I’ve made it a throw away, like, “see you later,” or “have a good day.” That’s not what I want it to be.

My kids know I love them. I have no doubts about that. But his “where are you going” comment was a wake up call. I want my “I love you guys” expressions to be felt, not just heard. That’s going to require that I say it when I can stick around long enough to show it as well.