Kids on the Web

Oct 20th, 2008 | By chrisbrogan | Category: Advice

Computer Family My dad got into computers in the 1970s. Sometimes, he’d take me to work and I’d play this Star Trek game on a computer that had to print out the “screen” on paper. Sometimes, I’d destroy reams of paper chasing a Klingon around. I had no idea how much I was underfoot, but my Dad was so loving, he didn’t tell me. I got my first computer in 1984, the first ever Apple Macintosh. My brother and I loved it. We composed music, did art, wrote stories, played those rudimentary (crappy) Apple games.

My daughter is six, and my son will be three in January. She’s been on the web since before she knew she was on the web. She can navigate to PBS Kids and Nick Jr. and whatever. She can help her little brother get to Thomas the Tank Engine’s site. They play together. Oh, and she goes to Webkins World, too. It’s weird when she’s more concerned about doing chores there than in real life, but otherwise, it’s fine.

When she wants to watch YouTube, I’m right there watching it with her. There are too many wrong turns inside YouTube, too much ’splainin to do, if she veers off.

At some point, she’ll try to steer her browser out into the larger web, and I’ll have to be ready to explain this all. I’ll have to help her understand stalking, porn, trust, media literacy, and much more. It’s almost overwhelming when you think of it. But the key word here is “almost.”

I had a great talk about this with my CEO. We both feel the same. NOT teaching your kids about the web, and NOT getting in there deep with them from the start is the wrong choice. Learn at home. Learn with intelligent parents who can share perspective, explain the importance of privacy, can explain how confidence games and trust works.

I’m thinking of launching a series of one day events on the topic: educating parents on how to talk with their kids about the web. I want to bring this out to as many people as I can. I think it’s important. I think this is education that we’re equipped to provide.

What do you think about it? Does it make sense? What’s your policy at home about kids on the web?

Related posts:

  1. YouTube Safe For Kids I just came across a post from LifeHacker a couple...
  2. Having “That” Conversation With Your Kids… Sex… is not what this post is about.  No birds...
  3. Listen To Your Kids Before I publicly announced on my website that I had...
  4. Why Am I More Competitive Than My Kids? Last week, my son and twin daughters each received either...
  5. Ten Reasons To Be Thankful For Your Kids At Thanksgiving If you are a parent, you should have no trouble...

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Tags: , ,
  • Yeah, similar to you Chris. We trust sites like Nick and NickJr to not have anything dodgy (this might be a problem? but not as far as I've seen).

    Otherwise we're pretty strict about where they go. Young at the moment. Will have to reevaluate soon I'm sure :)
  • Our son is almost 11...he's been online since he was old enough to move a mouse (maybe 18months or 2years?). We both spend time with him teaching him netiquette. He has his own blog (http://jcuellarslife.blogspot.com/). Would like to see him post more often, but homework, tennis, reading assignment s and such won't always 'give' him the time. In fact, I was spending time this evening IMing him in AIM when I received a tweet from you regarding this post. He's active on Woogie World and plays math games online with classmates. You just gotta love technology, right??
  • My kids are 5 and 9. They have been "on the web" since probably 2 or 3 yrs old. They mainly go to kid sites such as webkinz, noggin, playhouse disney. My older one loves to look up information and pictures on google (with full safe search on). He also loves weather sites--go figure. I am always there if they are on anything but a kid-only site. They aren't allowed any live chat, no AIM, myspace etc. We do look at YouTube together sometimes. (You can look up so many great things there--from old Shirley Temple vids to the original Speed Racer and Alvin and the Chipmunks). I'm sure many people would benefit from a seminar like you describe--especially parents who don't do much web surfing themselves.
  • Tim
    I respect your opinion, but personally I think it's disingenuous to describe the web as a "learning experience" for kids any younger than ten. Honestly, parents plop their children in front of the computer as a sort of babysitter - so mom and dad can have time to themselves. To say that Webkinz, PBS Kids or Nick Jr. is educational is fine bit of rationalization, IMO. Young kids would be much better off playing pretend with blocks or drawing with crayons - using their own minds to entertain rather than relying on an external source of entertainment.
  • While I was on maternity leave with all my kids, they were sitting on my lap as I was checking emails, etc. so the web has been part of their routine from birth . We just put in D-Link SecureSpot last year due to a detour our then 9 yr old son took with pop-ups as he was doing research on chickens (aka chicks) for a school report.

    Our 3 and 4 year olds go to specific kid-friendly sites with us right there. Our 10 and 8 yr olds surf disney, webkinz, nickjr, google for homework - heck, we look up random stuff all the time with them. It's their default source for news, info, local movies, ordering pizza, songs, games - their default period. We'll be watching TV and looking things up online in parallel, that's a lot of fun with Discovery Channel.

    I think our 10 and 8 yr olds type better than my husband. They all know more about getting around the web than my parents. And their favorite quiet game is "wwwdotshhhhhhhhhhdotcom" :).
  • I think teaching a series would be great! I think many parents (including me) feel this is very important. I worked with a media literacy group in Chicago and it was a very educational experience.

    You may want to consider teaching a joint session with 5-7 year olds and their parents. That's the age where children are just starting to share experiences with other kids and branch out beyond their first computer experiences. Some at that age still cannot use a mouse and many are illiterate, but still a great age to get them thinking about these issues.
  • Claire
    My kids are 12 and 8. My main worry about them on computers is just spending too much time (the addiction factor). I was surprised to hear the other night that my 8 year old has 587 friends on Roblox, his current favorite site. He has, however, accumulated these over a considerable period of time, and I believe embarked on a concerted spree to collect friends. His older brother has considerably fewer friends on Roblox, but is fascinated by the number of McCain supporters (not what he hears at home) and was asking my advice about some things he was going to post through his roblox character. Another opportunity to discuss civil discourse (not his intended approach). The 8 year old has been in a video with some other Roblox characters – presumably with a parent (or kid) savvy enough to capture the video and post it on YouTube. My younger son and a friend were listening to YouTube videos about Pokemon and apparently my older son cut them off when he decided a few were "inappropriate." The interesting thing about this is that I never learned this from the older son, but from the younger son at some point (and he wasn't complaining!). I could see this being an issue for some kids, however. Television has some qualities like the Internet. We have allowed our kids fairly free access to tv (such as The Simpsons). Watching these shows when the kids were younger definitely had them seeing some inappropriate things, we did get those "teaching moment" opportunities. Watching Homer's excesses actually helps them starkly see right from wrong. My younger son had big reading challenges, and while those were mainly tackled in school, he is now empowered at being able to navigate websites that he used to ask to be read to him. BTW, Toontown occupied my kids for about a year and a half. The younger one built lots of rooms and bought lots of things; the older one was fascinated by the corporate hierarchy of the "Cogs". We tried JuniorNet when it existed as an attempt to have a gated offering, but all it did was gunk up my computer. One other danger of free roaming on the Internet is that the kids initially downloaded free trials. They now generally ask, as they realize that some stuff just shuts down the computers.
  • My kids are 3 and 5. Both gets on pbskids.com. They do not go to any other site. When my now 5 yo was about 2 he loved sesamestreet.org. They both have their own accounts on the Mac and loves switching to their own account with their own passwords.

    I do have to control their time on the computer. They do not get to be on it every day. They also only get at the most an hour if they do.

    I do not forsee them "surfing" anywhere else anytime soon.

    @Tim my little one learnt to "type" and spell his name by typing on my Mac before he turned 3. He learnt that mixing blue and yellow makes green abt a year ago from playing on pbskids. Now he prefers to mix his own colors with paint. He asks for the basic colors. Most of the time both kids have to share one computer. The older one would guide and teach the younger one. They learn to share and take turns. The older one learns leadership and both learns social interaction. All of which can also be learnt through other forms of play as you've indicated. There's nothing wrong with learning these same skills with the computer/web. They both spend a lot of time drawing, writing, cutting paper -- just making stuff with paper and glue. They do this more than playing on the computer but that doesn't mean we should hide the computer from them altogether. I also believe in pretend play, open ended toys, simple blocks, and drawing (I own a specialty toy store). But I think variety and exposure is also important. The general rule of thumb -- too much of anything is not good.
  • I introduced my son to computers before he was 1. He's now 4, and I let him play on Peep and the Big Wide World and "surf" YouTube while supervised.
  • I think you're on the right track when you get involved with your kids on the Web and help them learn the ins and outs, the positives and the negatives.

    I know people who have guns in their home and they've had the kids involved with the guns since they were very young. They learned how to use them and how to respect their power and there was never a concern over them being mishandled in some way.

    When I was a kid, I had my first beer at home, with my dad. Later, when I was out with my peers and they were all excited about sneaking their first beer, I didn't participate. I didn't need to because my dad had taken away the excitement and taught me the right way and wrong way to deal with alcohol.

    I agree there might be times when the kids are spending too much time on the computer, but I think that is a symptom of poor parenting, not the fault of the technology.
  • I am so glad to hear that I'm not the only parent who lets her kid cruise the web. My son hangs on Webkinz, ToonTown, Nick, and a few other sites. He was excited to vote for the president on Nick.com. :)

    We've pretty much locked his computer down to those sites and he knows to ask before he goes anywhere else. We have had to explain that he should not to give out his real name, address, phone number, or email address (I'm not sure he even realizes he has an email address).

    He gave a friend at daycare his Webkinz password...and then dealt with the reprucussions when that kid changed the password and prevented him from accessing his beloved world of Webkinz. It ended up being a great lesson in not sharing passwords.

    And though he'd love to spend hours on the computer, I treat it just like TV and video games.

    Oh...lately, his new thing is writing a book on the computer. He's using basic word processing software and prints the book out so he can color pictures on it. He calls the series "God vs. Devil" and it's made by "Devil Comix, Inc." The basic idea is straight from Captain Underpants, but I don't know where he got the "God vs. Devil" bit.

    Anyhow...glad to hear about what everyone's doing. :)
  • Liz
    Chris: I do believe that there is a significant group of parents who are scared of what their kids can find on the web. Unfortunately, these are the parents who are not computer illiterate themselves and therefore you're not going to reach them online very easily. I personally have three boys 12, 10, 8. While hey call me addicted to the computer and my blackberry (yes I have to for work) I am happy to know that they prefer to play street hockey with the rest of the neighborhood boys rather than sitting at a computer surfing. They go to the web when they need to do research and they know how to find what they are looking for, and I've made it clear to them that although they maybe looking at a cool youtube video, they cannot just click any old "related video" because there's some bad stuff.

    I have another trick - I've convinced them that I can access anything on the home computer while I'm at work and get notified when they view anything "inappropriate" or say anything that's not nice on AIM. It just makes them think twice before surfing too far out . .
  • An interesting post. My wife was Interactive Editor at CBeebies (I guess PBS on roids - 3rd in traffic of the BBC sites after News and Sport) for 6 years and now Heads up Club Penguin in Europe.

    From her, I have understood loud and clear how important cyber safety and with it cyber bullying is a key, key issue for all parents to understand.

    Especially if you consider from how early an age kids are going to be digital.

    e.g.: Our little boy understood almost as soon as he could talk that the computer could give me on demand video, games, etc. while the 'analog' TV failed him.

    An important tip that the police pass on in the UK is never let children have computers in their rooms. They are in the family room, kitchen, where-ever so as a parent their computer use is in view and take time to understand their useage (e.g.: Talk to them about their social network buddy list.)
blog comments powered by Disqus