Bullies have been a part of childhood for centuries, but their reigns of terror are swiftly becoming short-lived these days thanks to all of the bully awareness and Anti-Bully prevention programs that exist today.

Obviously, it’s impossible to totally prevent bullying but we can always improve how and when we intervene whenever it does take place in a child’s life. Most of the time it happens at school, but it’s not relegated to the playground or cafeteria. Bullies can rear their ugly heads just about anywhere including even the safest of places such as church. So children are never really safe from bullying except when they’re home of course.

What are Signs That Your Child has been Bullied?
Every parent likes to believe that their relationship that their child would come running to them the moment someone picked on them, but that just doesn’t happen all of the time. Sadly, most children do not confide in their parents, teachers or any other adult. For whatever reason, too many children keep this to themselves. Thus it’s critical for parents to keep an eye open for any tell-tale signs that your child has been harmed in any manner, whether physically or emotionally. Here are some signs to spot:

1. Sudden change in personality, especially if their once enthusiastic attitude towards school wanes quickly.

2. Constant rumblings and complaints about going to school including faked attemtps at being sick in effort to miss school.

3. Sudden insistance on being driven to school in effort to avoid riding the school bus.

4. Loss of appetite or energy even long after coming home from school

5. Unusually quick temper at siblings or even towards you.

When to Intervene
If you are successful in discovering that your child has indeed been bullied at school or elsewhere, what should you do? The immediate response is to contact the school to report the little monsters that have been damaging your beloved little angel but resist this urge for now. The first thing to do is discover everything you can about what has taken place and then contact the bully’s parents first. It’s always wise to get both sides of the story before reporting another child to the school. Yes, as much as it would hurt you to think that your child might not be telling the entire truth, you need to control your emotions and conduct this matter as a criminal case as unbiased as possible. Sometimes parents of bullies can actually correct the bad behavior which not only helps your child but all other children that would’ve been bullied otherwise. Also, there’s always the slight chance that your child might have instigated the proceedings which means disciplinary actions for your child as well.

When to Go to the Top
If you’ve discussed the matter with the parents of the alleged bully and the behavior continues and your child is still bullied, then you have no other choice than to go to the proper channels at school and report what’s happened. It would also be wise to inform your child’s teachers and even the school bus driver so they can help you keep an eye on things.

What Else Can You or Schools Do?
Thankfully, there are a bunch of excellent anti-bullying programs out there now that travel around to schools to teach kids how wrong it is to pick on other kids. Perhaps you can convince your school to make arrangements for one of these organizations to speak at your school. Here are some of the most popular programs available today:
Dr. Phil have a powerful anti-bully program where his son Jay goes to school to educate them on the subject.

McGruff: the beloved crime dog talks to younger students about bullying.

Important News Items
The third annual National Bully Prevention Week that takes place this year October 5th thru 11th, 2008. There is a great deal of useful information on the website for parents and schools.

School Officially Bans Bullying!

Other Excellent Resources
ProjectBully
Stopbullyingnow.com
Safeyouth.org
Dealing with bullies and How not to be one
Kidpower.org
Kids Against Bullying
“Once Upon A Bully” movie

Protect Our Precious Angels
As parents, it is our obligation and natural instincts to protect our precious little angels. We need to do our best to keep our lines of communication open with our children. We must always keep aware of their emotional, physical, mental and spiritual status. Also, we need to do whatever we can to prevent anyone else from harming them, even if it’s just with words, which by the way are just as hurtful and perhaps even more damaging than physical abuse. Physical wounds will heal but the psychological pain inflicted by unkind words and the entire experience of bullying can last a lifetime.

Here are a couple of videos that sum everything up well. The first one is about words.
The next video isn’t even in english but its anti-bully message and the value of friendship is crystal clear.

Personal Confession
I have a confession to make. This topic is extra important to me because my nine year old recently encountered bullying for the first time in his life (and our’s as parents). We were shocked because he’s one of the happiest and most liked kids you’ll ever met. How could anyone ever not love our Nicky, never mind be mean to him? Well, it happens. We took the steps outlined above and spoke to the offender’s mother (his parents were divorce) for a long time and ever since that conversation everything’s been better than ever. Fortunately, we were able to discover what was going on early enough to nip it in the bud. The danger of bullying isn’t just with the one particular bully but the way that it seems to spread like a cancer to others children who wouldn’t behave in such a manner otherwise. The sooner this incideous disease is treated, the better the long term diagnosis for everyone. The word disease literally means the lack of peace, dis- and ease. When any one cell (person) is diseased then it can become cancerous to the entire body human (Man).
Ultimately, the best way to treat bullying is with love and kindness.

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