I’m a bad example for my kids.  I live my life with my hand and/or my ear seemingly fused to a mobile device.  My current device of choice (with the emphasis on “vice”) is the Palm Pre.  Before that it was an HTC Touch Pro, a myriad of Palm Treo’s, a Motorola StarTac, a Blackberry Pager… whatever.  The device doesn’t matter, the bad behavior does.  For practically all of their lives, I don’t think my kids have ever known me to not have a phone, pager or PDA in my pocket.  I am guilty of using these devices inappropriately at times when my attention would (and should) have been better served focused on my kids, and where I was and what we, as a family, were doing.

MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO…

Not surprisingly, my kids have grown up in a world where owning mobile devices and being constantly connected is the norm.  According to a recent study in the UK, the average age a child gets their first mobile phone is now 8 years old.  It should be no surprise then, that by the time they are teens most kids can text with their eyes closed and, like me, they are rarely seen without their phone in hand.  I see this with my own kids, and while the parent in me wants to (and does) tell them to “put the phone down for a change,” how can I say it with a straight face when I have a hard time letting go of my own phone.  Hypocrisy is not my cup of tea.  What’s a dad to do?

CREATING A “NO PHONE” ZONE

Last weekend my son Zach and I went to the neighborhood Starbucks to share a cup of coffee and some quiet time together and talk.  Really talk.  With that in mind, I made a conscious (and frankly, difficult) effort to NOT LOOK AT OR TOUCH my phone the entire time.  He agreed to do the same.  Without my pestering Pre and his interrupting iPhone, we actually had a great, thoroughly engaged CONVERSATION.  We both noted how enjoyable it was to really talk naturally, and not in our more common phone induced A-D-D like spurts.  It felt GOOD.  With that in mind, I am now determined to create “no phone zones” with my kids, particularly starting around meals.  All too often we sit down to eat together (at home and in restaurants) and before the first bite we are each already more fascinated by our phones than our forks.  We are sitting at the same table, but we are clearly not in the same place.  This needs to change.  For starters, I am thinking of taking a small basket, placing it in the living room, and designating it as the “phone repository” for us all, and requiring our phones to go in the basket before we enter the kitchen to sit down for a meal.

What do you think?  Do you share this concern or has my bad example created the “phone-tastic” times I am experiencing?  Have you been successful in creating “no phone zones” with your kids?  Please share your thoughts and experiences in the comments.

Jeff Sass is the proud dad of ZEO (Zach, 21, Ethan, 19 and Olivia, 17).  He is also a seasoned entertainment and technology exec and active social media enthusiast.  You can see more of Jeff’s writing at Sassholes! and Social Networking Rehab.

Photo Credit: © Stephen Finn – Fotolia.com

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